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Re: Recycling
Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2018 10:18 am
by lswot
Henry J wrote:Never iron a 4 leaf clover, you don't want to press your luck...
*****
...
Re: Recycling
Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2018 1:24 pm
by Xjmt
lswot wrote:Henry J wrote:Never iron a 4 leaf clover, you don't want to press your luck...
*****
...
Re: Recycling
Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2018 7:15 pm
by Henry J
Glad you liked it!
Re: Recycling
Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2018 7:16 pm
by Henry J
*****
(Serious groaner. Esp. if you don't like chicken jokes. )
Brewster the Rooster
My Uncle John was in the fertilized egg business when I was young. He had several hundred young layers, called pullets, and 8 roosters, whose job was to fertilize the eggs.
My uncle kept records, and any rooster or pullet that didn't perform well went into the stew pot and was replaced.
Now this took an awful lot of time. So my uncle got a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Now he could sit and fill out an efficiency report by listening to the sound of the bells.
My uncle's favorite rooster was old Brewster. A very fine specimen he was but his bell had not rung all morning. Uncle John went to investigate. Several roosters were chasing pullets, bells a-ringing.
Brewster had his bell in his beak so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up to a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. Uncle John was so proud, he entered him in the county fair. Brewster was an overnight sensation. The judges awarded Brewster two prizes,
1) The No Bell Prize
and
2) The Pullet Surprise.
*****
(What, no Oscar, Emmy, or Tony? )
(Remember, a chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
Probably trying to get away from Brewster. Or from Col. Reba, whichever. )
Re: Recycling
Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2018 10:05 am
by lswot
Henry J wrote:Glad you liked it!
Dreamer
Re: Recycling
Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2018 10:08 am
by lswot
Henry J wrote:*****
(Serious groaner. Esp. if you don't like chicken jokes. )
Brewster the Rooster
My Uncle John was in the fertilized egg business when I was young. He had several hundred young layers, called pullets, and 8 roosters, whose job was to fertilize the eggs.
My uncle kept records, and any rooster or pullet that didn't perform well went into the stew pot and was replaced.
Now this took an awful lot of time. So my uncle got a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Now he could sit and fill out an efficiency report by listening to the sound of the bells.
My uncle's favorite rooster was old Brewster. A very fine specimen he was but his bell had not rung all morning. Uncle John went to investigate. Several roosters were chasing pullets, bells a-ringing.
Brewster had his bell in his beak so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up to a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. Uncle John was so proud, he entered him in the county fair. Brewster was an overnight sensation. The judges awarded Brewster two prizes,
1) The No Bell Prize
and
2) The Pullet Surprise.
*****
(What, no Oscar, Emmy, or Tony? )
(Remember, a chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
Probably trying to get away from Brewster. Or from Col. Reba, whichever. )
...
Re: Recycling
Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2018 3:06 pm
by Henry J
What happened when a criminal fell in the ocean?
There was a crime wave.
Re: Recycling
Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2018 3:29 pm
by Henry J
What did the egg in the monastery say?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Out of the frying-pan, into the friar."
Re: Recycling
Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2018 7:12 pm
by Henry J
Counselor:
Now this is a dogwood tree
.
Camper:
How can you tell?
.
.
Counselor:
By its bark.
.
(Woof!)
Re: Recycling
Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2018 9:28 am
by lswot
Henry J wrote:Counselor:
Now this is a dogwood tree
.
Camper:
How can you tell?
.
.
Counselor:
By its bark.
.
(Woof!)
Ok....that was pretty good.
Re: Recycling
Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2018 5:11 pm
by Henry J
What
do you get
when you cross
an elephant
with a kangaroo?
.
.
.
.
Earthquakes in Australia.
Re: Recycling
Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2018 12:23 pm
by Xjmt
OK, that's cute!
Re: Recycling
Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2018 6:06 pm
by lswot
Xjmt wrote:OK, that's cute!
Not bad.....
Re: Recycling
Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2018 7:38 pm
by Henry J
So,
.
what
.
has 4 wheels
.
and flies?
.
.
.
A garbage truck.
Re: Recycling
Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2018 4:11 pm
by Henry J
Why
.
did the kid
.
study
.
in the airplane?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Because he wanted a higher education!
*********************
(Or did he simply want to study plane geometry? )