Recycling

[lswot]

..

[Xjmt]

"Roses are blue, violets are pink, 'specially after the 15th drink".

[Henry J]

Is that sort of like "beauty is in the eye of the beer holder"?

[Henry J]

Fishing Funny
A man was watching a fisherman at work. The fisherman caught a giant trout but threw it back into the river. Next the fisherman hooked a huge pike and threw it back. Finally, the fisherman caught a little bass. He smiled and put the little bass in his bag.

"Hey," yelled a guy who was watching. "Why did you throw back a giant trout and a huge pike and then keep a little bass?"

The fisherman yelled back, "Small frying pan."

(Out of the frying pan, into the fisherman?)

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[Henry J]

Q: Why did the melon and the honeydew have a big wedding?

A: Because they cantaloupe!

(Sounds fruitful!)

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[lswot]

.

[Henry J]

Then again, maybe it was actually fruitless?

[Henry J]

Why did the banana elope instead of a big wedding? It had to split!

[Henry J]

A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"

"Is this her first child?" the doctor asks.

"NO, you *idiot*!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"

(Push, push!)

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[lswot]

.....here's yer sign

[Xjmt]

.....here's yer sign

[Henry J]

Three buddies die in a car crash, and they find themselves at the pearly gates.

They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you?

The first guy says, "I would like to hear them say that I was the greates doctor of my time, and a great family man."

The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher who made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow."

The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say... LOOK!!! HE'S MOVING!!!!!"

(Ah, but to where is he moving?)

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[lswot]

Ooops........Zombie land?

[Xjmt]

Ooops........Zombie land?

[lswot]

Ooops........Zombie land?

..