Recycling

[Henry J]

Entertainment Jokes

Two lawyers went into the restaurant and ordered two drinks. Then they got sandwiches out of their briefcases and started to eat.

The waiter said, "Hey, you can't eat your own sandwiches in here!"

So the lawyers traded sandwiches.

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[Henry J]

Police Jokes

"What am I supposed to do with this?" grumbled the motorist as the police clerk handed him a receipt for his traffic violation.

"Keep it," the clerk advises. "When you get four of them, you get a bicycle."

(At which point you can put pedal to metal?)

[Henry J]

Business Jokes

"This little computer," said the a sales clerk, "will do half your job for you."

The senior manager studying the machine made his decision; "Fine, I'll take two."

(That's business managers for ya, huh? )

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[Henry J]

Male Jokes

A man tells his friend, Las Vegas is loaded with all kinds of gambling devices.
"Dice tables, slot machines, and wedding chapels."

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[Xjmt]

Male Jokes

A man tells his friend, Las Vegas is loaded with all kinds of gambling devices.
"Dice tables, slot machines, and wedding chapels."

=============

[Henry J]

Bar & Drinking Jokes

A man walks into a bar and orders 3 beers.

The bartender asks him why he gets three beers the man told the bartender well one is for me and the other two, for my brothers who live in Texas.

The man does this for about a week and one day the man walks in and orders two beers instead of three. The
bartender asks him why just two the man said well my wife told me I had to quit drinking but she didn't say anything about my brothers to stop.

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[lswot]

he should of started with a larger family

[Xjmt]

he should of started with a larger family

[Henry J]

To my buddies who might enjoy this test ...

Follow the directions! The following was developed as a mental age assessment by the School of Psychiatry at Harvard University.

Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person over 40 years of age cannot do it!

1. This is this cat.
2. This is is cat.
3. This is how cat.
4. This is to cat.
5. This is keep cat.
6. This is an cat.
7. This is old cat.
8. This is person cat.
9. This is busy cat.
10. This is for cat.
11. This is forty cat.
12. This is seconds cat.

Scroll down...

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Now go back and read the third word in each line from the top down and I'll bet you can't resist passing it on.

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[lswot]

Well, it all depends on what the definition of "is" is.

[Henry J]

is is what it is!

[lswot]

[Henry J]

Police Jokes

Two prisoners were making their escape over the jailhouse roof when one of them dislodged a tile. "Who's there?" shouted a guard.

The first prisoner replied with a convincing imitation of a cat's meow. Reassured, the guard when back to his rounds.

But then the second prisoner dislodged another tile. The guard repeated, "Who's there?"

"The other cat," answered the prisoner.

(Sounds like it may be time to call out the dogs! )

(MEOW!)

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[Henry J]

Men Vs. Women Jokes

A girl involved with the women's lib group boarded a crowded bus and one man rose to his feet. "No, No, you must not give up your seat. I insist," she said.

The man replied; "You may insist as much as you like, Lady, but this is my street where I get off."

(Details, details!)

[Henry J]

Signs Jokes

Sign seen in a veterinarian's office:

The doctor is in. Sit. Stay.

(Woof!)